Note: All comments in my videos are strictly my opinion.
Body Language – Woman from deadly DUI crash
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Mandy, your explanation of parenting and conscience development by catching them every time, then applying consequences that outweigh the stolen cookie was the most concise explanation of proper parenting I think I have ever heard. Having dealt with so many kids that were not parented that way, there were really two types. First type, like this one are the dumb ones. They get caught most of the time and just keep trying the same manipulations that worked on parents and teachers. If they don’t work, they just keep trying in the case of girls- many of the guys escalate by running or fighting. Then there are the more cunning ones, well on their way to being psychopaths. When you catch them every time, they learn to avoid you and move on to a different target. Those, I had to identify early and to contain them, and make sure they were rarely alone with weaker staff and teachers. Very few school people these days hold anybody accountable for anything, including themselves, which only exacerbates the bad parenting.
Her mindset was pretty clear to me from the get go when she said, “I’m (pointing to herself) the only one (index finger raised straight up)”. Like many people I know in her age group, they really are incapable of seeing past themselves. When told two people are dead (as in SHE KILLED two people), it just doesn’t compute in her brain. No shock, no look of horror, no remorse whatsoever. If there was, I missed it. She doesn’t even question it, like it doesn’t matter. Even at the police station, she doesn’t seem to realize her own life is screwed because of her DUI and killing 2 people. Again, typical of her generation. They don’t comprehend they are responsible for their actions and there is a price to be paid for not being able to see past themselves. Is it bad parenting alone or does being given participation trophies and such add to that kind of mindset?
Update: In imposing her 14 year sentence, the judge stated that he is required to strike a balance between deterrence and rehabilitation, so he could not impose the 22 years sought by prosecutors. This, in spite of the fact that she was three times over the legal limit, was speeding while drunk, struck the victims with such force that one of their legs was severed and imbedded in the grill of her car, and danced and sang while discussing her upcoming trip to Vegas in the hospital. Would she have gotten the 22 if she were not using feminine wiles on the judge?
Thank you for that update! Got a (dot com) link? With the lack of justice these days, it’s good to know at least she got sentenced to more than a month or two. Severed leg imbedded in the grill of her car… Whoa!!!! If I remember correctly, this happened in your State. If so, do you know how long before she can be let out on parole?
Yes, the case happened in Peoria, where my brother used to be the Assistant States Attorney prosecuting drunk driving cases before he moved to the private sector. She has to do at least 11 because of the class of felony it is, but will probably get another 180-364 days off if she completes rehab and stays out of trouble in the joint, (that part is highly unlikely due to her color and attitude). I learned more about the case from Dr. Grande’s You Tube channel. Though I sometimes disagree with his analysis , he correctly has her pegged completely on this one.
Thanks again. I’ll take a look at Dr. Grande.
I don’t know about the ‘right’ way to parent….as young parents, we do the best we can but I can only hope my kids bestow some parenting skills on their kids….disciplining teenagers are the worst…..and I might say girls can really butt heads with mom.
I used to do the ‘time out’ thing…#of minutes by age….until I saw how my kids were in cahoots together if they saw the other one ‘suffering’. One time at a neighbor’s house, my son took all my pictures out of my wallet and marked them all up with a marker….I said the usual: “time out!”….then my son said: “oh no mom there is no time out chair here”….(to which I said: oh yes, every house has a time out chair).
When the boys were old enough to print, and wanted something badly, I made them print a couple of paragraphs as to why they thought they needed the item. I never sent them ‘to their room’ because I didn’t want them to hate their rooms…..later on, it was probably no allowance or no car keys…I knew time was running out before they left home….a couple of cop stories…..nothing serious. (we laugh about it now).
It’s kind of fun to see my sons discipline their kids, but…there really aren’t books about what is right in how to discipline….I sure as heck didn’t want to spank my kids like my mom did me until 8th grade….I do believe in ‘outsmarting’ a 4 year old though!
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